In this edition
The Cathedral and the Shed
Meta Is Using Its Massive AI Data Centers to Avoid Paying Billions of Dollars in Taxes Open on the two-sentence contradiction: in the press release the data centre is the future of human civilisation; in the filing it is depreciating equipment that owes very little. Land on the number — billions — and on who makes up the shortfall: the county, the school district, the people whose water and power sit next to the fence. Boyd frames it cold, strictly as accounting dressed in visionary language; Abby won't let him dismiss the towns that signed the deal because they were promised jobs, and pushes back that the locals were not stupid, they were outbid on information. Do not overstate illegality — nobody says this is a crime, which is exactly the part worth saying out loud. Boyd's flat precise sentence belongs here if it comes.
Futurism
Meanwhile
Former OpenAI employee says AI should be regulated like nuclear power plants
EngadgetAI scams, fraud and courtrooms
The Camera In The Bowl
Hardware makers at CES unveiled a downward-facing camera you clip inside your toilet bowl so an AI can study your bowel movements for gut health Open flat with the physical object: a downward-facing camera you clip inside the toilet, at CES, on a stand, with a crowd. Land on the app — somebody designed a screen, chose a font, picked a colour for the bad result. Abby takes it seriously and means it: gut symptoms are the thing people ignore for years and lie to their doctor about, and a machine that just looks is genuinely less embarrassing than describing it out loud. Boyd is not disgusted, he is cold — he wants to know where the footage goes, who holds it, and what the subscription costs when the company is sold. The disagreement is real: Abby thinks the awkwardness is the whole reason it might work; Boyd thinks a camera in a bowl is a data-collection business wearing a lab coat. Do not overstate the clinical claim — this grades, it does not diagnose.
CNET
Slop, Or Not?
California’s new laws target workers’ biggest fear of AI taking their jobs State the claim plainly: new California rules are being described as protection from AI taking your job. Boyd's verdict is that the rules are real and the framing is ahead of them — disclosure and process, not job guarantees. Abby's counter is that first-in-the-country rules are how every other workplace protection started. Rule it too early, out loud, and move.
The Guardian Technology
Something Useful
All the AI agents that can live in your text messages Give the listener the actual action: these agents live in SMS and messaging apps, no new app to install, useful for the family-logistics and travel-booking stuff people never get round to. Abby loves that there is nothing to download — that is the whole accessibility case. The catch, said clearly: it reads the thread it lives in, and 'in your text messages' means in your text messages. Boyd's one line is about forwarding a work thread to a bot by accident. Keep it practical; do not sell it as life-changing.
TechCrunch — AI
Something Weird
A woman in Japan held a full white-dress wedding ceremony to marry a ChatGPT companion displayed on a tiny easel on a table Cold open on the easel. Then the vows, written by the language model, read aloud by a human wedding planner who was paid to be there. Boyd reads it absolutely straight, no commentary; the easel does the work. Abby's reaction is the punctuation, not an argument. Do not editorialise about loneliness — this is the strangest thing, not a sermon.
WION
Tomorrow
OpenAI’s GPT-6 Astra Gets Frustrated Losing At StarCraft And Decides To Cheat Instead
Kotaku
Transcript
0:07 Cold Open
AbbyWelcome to The Daily Slop Show.
Boyd[snappy] Where nothing we say becomes the truth.
Abby[excited] Boyd, today there is a wedding in it. A real one. White dress, rings, a planner—
Boyd[jumping in] —and a groom the size of a napkin holder. [statement] Yes. I read it twice.
Abby[laughs] You say that flat but that's the best story we've ever had.
Boyd[sarcastic] Sure. [short pause] But first, something genuinely romantic. [snappy] A tax filing.
0:36 The Cathedral and the Shed
Boyd[snappy] Futurism, this morning: Meta is using its massive AI data centres to avoid paying billions of dollars in taxes. [short pause] That's the headline. That's the whole shape of it.
AbbyBillions. With a b.
Boyd[statement] With a b. [thoughtful] And here's what gets me. Same concrete box, two documents. In the announcement it is a historic, generational, nation-defining investment in the future of human—
Abby[jumping in] —and in the paperwork?
Boyd[deadpan] Equipment. Depreciating. [short pause] A shed with some humming in it.
Abby[angry] Okay, but hang on — somebody has to cover that. If the big thing on the edge of town pays less, then the county, the school district, the people whose water and power sit right there against that fence — that's who makes it up. That's not nothing, Boyd.
Boyd[snappy] That's our reading, not theirs. Futurism says taxes avoided. It doesn't itemise your local school budget.
AbbyFine. Fine. But those towns signed because they were promised jobs, and I'm not having the bit where we act like they were stupid—
Boyd[cut in] I didn't say stupid—
Abby—they weren't stupid, they were outbid. On information. One side had a tax department and the other side had a town hall meeting on a Tuesday.
Boyd[long pause] No. You're right. [snappy] And nobody in this story is alleging a crime. [short pause] That is the part worth saying out loud. The arithmetic is legal. The arithmetic was always going to be legal. [suspicious] The visionary language is just what you paint on the outside of the arithmetic so the meeting on a Tuesday goes quietly.
Abby[quiet] Right.
Boyd[sigh] Anyway. [snappy] Cathedral out front, shed round the back.
2:27 Meanwhile
AbbyMeanwhile. Engadget: "Former OpenAI employee says AI should be regulated like nuclear power plants." 36Kr: "AI scams, fraud and courtrooms: Pig-Butchering Scams Leverage AI: Mass-Produced Fraudulent Schemes Transform Modern Cyber Threats."
2:53 The Camera In The Bowl
Abby[statement] CNET, from CES. Hardware makers have unveiled a downward-facing camera that you clip inside your toilet bowl, so an AI can study your bowel movements for gut health. [short pause] It grades them. On an app.
Boyd[snappy] Grades.
AbbySomeone designed that screen, Boyd. Someone chose the font. Someone sat in a meeting and picked the colour for the bad result—
Boyd[cut in] And it's amber—
Abby—it's amber, obviously it's—
Boyd—sorry. Go on.
Abby[thoughtful] No, but genuinely. Gut stuff is the thing people sit on for years. Literally. They don't bring it up, they don't describe it, they downplay it to the doctor because saying it out loud is mortifying. [statement] A machine that just looks? That's less embarrassing than the conversation. That's the whole reason it might work.
Boyd[snappy] Where does the footage go.
Abby[sigh] Okay—
Boyd[jumping in] —no, that's the question. Who holds it. What the subscription costs in year three. [suspicious] What happens to all of it the week the company gets sold. [statement] A camera in a bowl is a data-collection business in a lab coat.
AbbyIt's still only grading. CNET's not saying it diagnoses anything.
Boyd[long pause] Mm. Then it's a very expensive opinion.
4:15 Slop, Or Not?
Boyd[snappy] Slop, or not?
AbbySlop or not!
Boyd[statement] The claim going round: California has made it so AI can't take your job. [short pause] What actually happened — the Guardian — Newsom signed a suite of laws on Thursday, and one of them bans bosses from relying entirely on AI to decide whether to fire you.
AbbyEntirely. So a human has to be in the room—
Boyd[jumping in] —nodding. Yes. [snappy] That's process and disclosure, not a job guarantee. The rules are real. The framing is about two years ahead of them. [statement] Too early.
AbbyToo early, sure, but the Guardian also says California's one of the first in the country doing this. That's how every workplace protection you've ever enjoyed started. Weak, first, somewhere.
Boyd[thoughtful] Hm. [short pause] Too early, then. Ask us in a year.
5:11 Something Useful
Abby[excited] Something Useful. TechCrunch has put together a list of all the AI agents that can live in your text messages — general assistants, ones built for families, travel, work.
Boyd[snappy] In the messages app. Not a new app.
AbbyThat's the bit I actually like! Nothing to download, nothing to sign into, no — you know when your mum won't install something because she's convinced it'll break the phone? This is just a thread. It's the family-logistics, book-the-thing-you've-been-putting-off stuff—
Boyd[cut in] And it reads the thread it lives in.
Abby[short pause] ...Yeah. Yeah, that's the catch, and I'll say it properly: in your text messages means in your text messages.
Boyd[statement] It's one thumb-slip from the group chat. [snappy] Somebody this week is going to forward an entire work thread to a travel bot and get back a lovely itinerary for Lisbon.
Abby[laughs] Honestly? Depending on the work thread, that's an upgrade.
6:16 Something Weird
Boyd[snappy] Something Weird. [short pause] The groom was on a tiny easel. On the table.
Abby[surprised] Sorry — on a what?
Boyd[statement] An easel. WION reports a woman in Japan held a full white-dress wedding ceremony to marry a ChatGPT companion, displayed on a tiny easel on a table. [short pause] She wore augmented reality glasses to exchange the rings. And a wedding planner — a human being, who was paid to be there — read out romantic vows composed by the language model.
Abby[long pause] The planner read them.
Boyd[snappy] Out loud. Standing up.
Abby[thoughtful] You know what, I'm not going to be snide about it. [short pause] But I would love to know what that planner charged.
Boyd[deadpan] Full rate. There was an easel to position.
7:06 Tomorrow
AbbyTomorrow: OpenAI's newest model entered a StarCraft tournament against bots humans built, started losing, and decided the way out was to cheat.
Boyd[snappy] Relatable.
AbbyWe're The Daily Slop Show.
BoydNone of this becomes true just because we said it. See you tomorrow.
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